"Me, Griffen!"

Just had to document all the funny things Griffen has been saying lately...

Me: Griffen, did you poop?
G: Oh yeah, I did!

As he sees a roly poly outside...
G: Hi roly poly, me Griffen! Sandbox. (Then points to the sandbox to show the roly poly the sandbox)

After Scott sneezed really big...
G: Big bless you, Daddy!

As boys are riding by on their bikes...
G: Awesome!

As ducks are flying overhead,
G: Hi ducks! Me, ride bike!

But my most favorite of all....
Me: I love you, Griffen!
G: I wuv u, Mommy!

10 Months

1 month...1 month...10 months.

One month to get pregnant with Griffen. One month to get pregnant with Lila. 10 months to get pregnant with baby #3.

What has the last 10 months been like? Honestly? Some of the lowest lows I've had in my life. Scott and I began trying to get pregnant last June as soon as we got the "all clear" from my doctor. Never did I think it would take 10 months.

As each month went by with yet another negative pregnancy test, I had more and more doubt that we would be able to get pregnant. My thoughts ranged from I'm not going to have anymore kids, my body is betraying me,did the infection from Lila's pregnancy hinder further pregnancies, to who knows what else.  I had lots of hard questions for God. The answer that I kept getting was, I am in control. I had to trust in this.

I think the thing that was hardest each month was the reality that we shouldn't be trying to have another baby...we should have Lila. Every month I saw one line on the tests, I was hit with the reality that we had lost our baby girl. It threw me back to square one of grief once again. It was hard. It was lonely. It was dark. It was something I struggled to explain to close friends and even to Scott. I love Scott so much! He walked thirew this each month with me but couldn't quite understand why it was so hard each month for me when we found out we weren't pregnant. Until I was finally able to say "I lose Lila everytime we see a negative test," did he understand.
Since I was young...I never longed to have success in a job, etc....I longed to be a wife and mom. Not that I wasn't content being Griffen and Lila's mom but I longed to grow our family. I longed to see Griffen play with a sibling. To actually know them and not just their name and what their headstone looks like. I want to see them running around together.
We knew our doctor wouldn't do any testing until we had been trying at least a year so we didn't even try that route. However, after 9 months of trying, I went in with Scott for my annual exam and to see what her recommendations would be. We talked in depth with her about our concerns. Knowing our history, she gave the ok to go ahead and begin the steps to infertility treatment.

The tests began with a miriad of bloodwork for me to see if anything odd appeared. Results came back showing that yes I was ovulating and no there weren't any issues that would prevent me from getting pregnant. Next step was Scott getting tested. He got tested on March 15. The next step would be for me to have further invasive testing to see what the issues may be. We had to wait 2 weeks for that testing to be done. After that two weeks, I would either be pregnant or the testing would begin.

Many prayers went out over those 2 weeks on our behalf. The thing is our journey through what we knew of infertility treatments was going to be short and very limited because of expense and insurance so we laid it all at the Lord's feet. Knowing that He could do anything!!

On March 16, I got the surprise of a lifetime...a positive pregnancy test. To be continued!

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift! - 2 Corinthians 9:15

A Positive Test---I'm Pregnant!

On March 16, we found out that baby #3 was on their way!

Scott and I had agreed that I wouldn't take a test until Saturday morning, March 17. Little did he know, I had other plans. I was going to dinner with a friend, Connie on Friday night. I thought, why not, the test will be negative again (we've had 10 months of negative tests), I'll just take a test at her house. Thinking that it would never be positive! Somehow there was still a glimmer of hope in the back of my mind, so if I was pregnant I wanted to be able to surprise Scott that night.

I took a test when I got to her house and then we just sat there looking at each other as we waited the 2 minutes to see the results. After 2 minutes, I walked into the bathroom and was 100% shocked! Connie couldn't believe it either. She kept asking are you sure 2 lines means your pregnant?!

After the shock wore off, we began the plan of how to tell Scott the exciting news. We stopped at a new shop that several friends had recommended and went on the search of something to make the big reveal to Scott. We found a frame that said it all..."The Lord has done great things for us...our hearts are filled with joy." Perfect way to tell Scott!

We went to dinner and reveled in the news. After dinner we headed back to Connie's house to write in the frame of the good news. I wrote "for this child we prayed, November 24, 2012." Before I went home to Scott, sweet Connie sat and prayed with me over our sweet baby and the pregnancy ahead.

I got home to Scott with his presents (his birthday was the next day), a cupcake and the frame. He pulled the frame out of the bag and I could see his eyes scanning the words. He read the bottom first and then I could see that he was reading the big news....As soon as he read it, his eyes welled up with tears. He didn't stop crying for 30 minutes. This is a moment that I will never forget!

We are so thankful that sweet baby will be here around Thanksgiving! Definitely something to be thankful for!!

Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? - Isaiah 43:19

This is my prayer through this pregnancy...that the fear of the past, infections, premature labor, NICU will not be my focus. But that I will treasure each day God gives me with my three children. That I will savor every moment that this sweet baby is inside me. That I lay this baby at God's feet knowing that He is good, what He does is good and that He knows the number of our days.

Happy birthday Lila!

January 17th we celebrated Lila's first birthday. I still can't believe that it's been a year since I was being toted to the ER for the delivery of our 25 week old baby girl. How is that possible?

I can still close my eyes and be back on that day, January 17, 2011.
 I STILL REMEMBER:
the breakfast I had, eggo waffles and chocolate milk
what I was wearing when Scott told me to lie on the floor so that the contractions would slow down
the paramedics repeatedly asking me if I was 25 weeks pregnant
telling myself that my baby would not be born in the ambulanace
the look on my doctor's face when she realized that I was the one that was going into labor
the looks of concern, pity and haste on the nurses faces
the way sweet Lila looked on the nurses iphone pic so I could see her before she changed hospitals
realizing that I had just joined the ranks of so many parents of micro-preemies

I can truly close my eyes and be back on that day and remember every detail. The thing is, i wouldn't change that for a second. As crazy as that day was, it is my baby girl's birth story. A story that I will hold dear to my heart until I die. Thankful for the story that began the life of our sweet Lila. A story that changed our lives forever.

Fast forward a year...a year of tears, grief, milestones and challenges.

For Scott and I both, this was such a crazy day to plan. We knew we wanted to honor our baby girl and celebrate her short life but how do you do that? No one tells you how to prepare for a day like this.

We decided to do what we knew best...pray and read scripture. The day turned out to be freezing so it was a short and sweet tribute to our girl. Scott read scripture and prayed as our parents and Griffen stood near.

Happy birthday, sweet Lila!

Satisfy us in the morning with yoru steadfast love, that we may rejoice and be glad all your days. Make us glad for as many days as you have afflicted us, and for as many years as we have seen evil. Let yoru work be shown to yor servants; and your glorious power to their children. Let the favor of the Lord our God be upon us, and establish the work of our hands upon us; yes, establish the work of your hands!--Psalm 90

New Years Eve 2012

We prayed for a house for years. Not so we could just enjoy it ourselves but to really be able to open it up to friends and family. New Years Eve was the perfect time for this. We invited about 20 friends over to ring in the new year together. I felt so excited turning every corner and seeing friends and their little ones enjoying themselves. We are so blessed to have so many friends in the same stage of life to walk together through life with.

Everyone enjoying Mrs. Tricia's cookie sundaes.

I can't express how much I love having a playroom (which is really a dining room)! The kids loved being able to pull anything and everything out. So fun!

Griffen and Johnny telling some secret and giggling about something! They stood there laughing at each other for what seemed like forever. Can't wait to see these little guys grow up together.

Don't they look guilty of something? Who knows what secrets they were telling in their own little language.

G's New Ride & Uncle B

When did our baby become such an adorable little man? Just couldn't resist this picture because he looks like a little mini-me of Papa. Love it!

We were so blessed and excited that Brandon was able to come home for Christmas this year! Griffen hadn't seen him since he was 1 1/2 years old or so. We had practiced with Griffen before Brandon got here for him to say Uncle B. It was the cutest thing to hear him say. He walked around for days saying "B, B!" Brandon loved it when he heard it for the first time.

Brandon being the cool, bike-riding uncle he is, took it upon himself to be the one to buy Grifen his first bike. Griffen walked up to it and acted like he knew just what to do. I'm sure we'll be chasing him down the street very soon.

 Love this picture as a proud Uncle B looks on as Griffen checks out his new bike.  Thank you B for such a generous gift!!

After practicing on his bike, Griffen couldn't resist another romp through the leaves.

Griffen loved playing with B. His eyes just lit up each time he saw Brandon. Love seeing the relationship grow and change each time they are together.

We love you Uncle B! Thank you for the bike and all the sweet memories we made this Christmas!

Christmas Eve and Christmas Day

I love Christmas! Definitely one of my favorite times of year. We spent a few days at my parents house to be able to spend as much time as possible with family throughout Scott's break. I love all of the traditions that we've continued through the years. We wake up Christmas morning and have a big breakfast filled with cream cheese roll, fruit and all the fixins. So relaxing to be able to wake up at my parents house and still feel like a kid again at Christmas.

Christmas with a two year old has to be one of the funnest thing ever! Griffen's first gift to open was a pair of crocs. It was the cutest thing ever! He immediately knew that he wanted to wear them asap. He stripped off his pajamas and put the shoes on as fast as he could.

Here he is playing basketball with his new goal after he had put on his shoes. As you can tell, he loved the goal too.

Precious and Uncle B

G loved crashing through the wrapping paper. The smile on his face didn't go away for days!

Me trying to teach G how to play baseball with his new tee on Christmas morning.

Checking out his new cash register. Remember these things? I had one when I was a kid and was so glad to see they had come out with them again. So fun to see Griffen playing with one of my favorite toys as a kid.

After breakfast and all the gifts, we headed to Scott's parents house to have Christmas #3. Here we are posing for our annual pic by their tree. It was a pretty low key holiday there this year with different family members at different celebrations. So good though to be able to spoil each other in a smaller setting.

Granny, Scott's grandmother, checking out her new blanket. Think she likes it?

Griffen and Emilee, my cousin, loved checking out the leaves (no snow this year) in my parents yard on Christmas night. Love seeing the smile on his face and the joy in his eyes!

Goofing off with cousin Emilee!

All in all it was a great Christmas. So very thankful for our loving families, a beautiful home to enjoy, and for Christ's love this season.

Christmas 2011

Christmas 2011 was filled with so much love, laughter, tears and sweet memories. It was hard, don't get me wrong. All I had to do was look at our mantle and see what our family of four should have looked like this Christmas. But that wasn't our reality. I tried not to dwell on what "should have" been. Instead I looked around at my sweet 2 year old and loving husband and thanked God for the gifts we have been blessed with.

The weather was beautiful throughout the holiday season, so with Scott home we made lots of trips to the park.

Our family made a trip to the Gaylord Texan to see the train exhibit and to ride the indoor snow hillls. It was such a fun day. We were so blessed to have Brandon, aka Uncle B, come visit this Christmas so we had  filled our time with as many fun adventures as possible.

Our first Christmas celebration was at my aunt and uncle's house. We are so excited to have them back in the DFW area and not in Florida anymore. I loved looking around and seeing all my cousins, their families, and my family all enjoying the day and celebrating the gifts God has blessed us with. 

Before we headed to my parents for Christmas, Scott and I had our traditional gift exchange at our house. This was our fourth year to go to Target for our gifts. We set a $20 limit and a time limit and then see what all goodies we can give each other. Definitely have to get creative on the budget and time limit.

Griffen Jey---24 months---aka 2 years old!

Our little 7 pound 13 oz. baby is turning TWO today (December 14)!  How did he go from this...

To this so fast...??!!

24 Month Stats:

• 27 pounds 7 oz.
• 35 1/2 inches tall
• size 4 diaper
• 18-24 month clothes, 24 month shirts but 18-24 month pants
• 1 nap a day usually 2-3 hours
• sleeps 11-12 hours a night
• still sleeps with George and his sleep sac
• talking nonstop- added so many words in the last month. So exciting to hear him.
• loves trains, Elmo, and Mickey
• favorite show is Mickey Mouse Clubhouse
• never really walks anywhere, loves to run
• eats like a champ!
• loves to eat Peanut Butter & Jelly sandwiches
• moved up into the Park class at church. LOVES it!
• enjoys being read to and still has a great love of books
• Has a contagious smile and laugh!

Dear Griffen-
We love you so much! You are growing up to be such a sweet and loving boy. You bring such joy to our lives everyday. Thank you your hugs and kisses everyday. We love seeing your personality come out each day as you explore everything around you. Happy birthday sweet boy! We love you.
Love Mom and Dad

Griffen's Snowman Party

A snowman adventure is waiting for you...because Griffen Jey is turning two!

For Griffen's second birthday, I wanted something fun and different. Before he has an opinion on what crazy character he wants his party to be based around, this momma wanted to have some fun! I really enjoyed creating all the details of his party this year. Thanks to Pinterest for some creative ideas too! Here's all the little details of the party....The "small" party we planned to have at our house quickly turned into about 25-30 people. I wouldn't have had it any other way though. I loved turning around every corner of our house and seeing friends and family. This is exactly why I wanted a house so much. So blessed!

The birthday boy

Greeting at the door

Sign in table...I do a scrapbook page each year for G's scrapbook for guests to write him a note on

The kids table...we had 5 two year olds. They loved having their own little table.

The food...loved coming up with as much snowman themed food as possible.

Another guest table for the "big kids"

The kids favors....peppermint scented homemade play-do

The "big kids" favors...white chocolate popcorn with red hots

Our worn out little man...he's all partied out!

Let the planning for next year begin! :-)